I just had a bunch of stuff I wanted to blog about, but I forgot most of it. I'll start with this. I think I need prayer for spiritual discernment. There are times when I have a thought, and I'm pretty sure it's not me, but at the same time I'm unsure if it's Him. I'm not going to go into details, but there was a night a few days ago where I had a thought and I tried thinking of other possibilities, but I kept coming back to this one thought. Turns out I was right. Maybe I need to have more faith that it is Him? I dunno.
Earlier I was mad, because of the whole car thing when we were leaving the Greutmans, but I also felt bad for feeling that way. It's weird. I felt like I shouldn't have been mad, but I was.
The prayer walk last night was amazing. Hong Zhu is so incredibly amazing, I absolutely love her. I felt so convicted about my family. I've been fine just letting them live their lives in pain and worry and sadness, and it breaks my heart.
I'm just writing a lot of random things. I get sad when I think about having to leave in two weeks. I really don't want to, but I have my job back home. I'm just afraid of missing out on a lot this summer. I don't want to. I'm going to see if my sister will bring me to Oswego sometimes. I hope she does. It's going to be a rough summer. I'll just have to take it one day at a time. It'll be hard keeing in touch with everyone. Blah.
It's interesting how a person's testimony can completely change your perspective of them. It just goes to show, don't judge a book by its cover. Thursday at Bible Study. The circle part was encouraging, but the actual Bible study part, even though I'm sure it was supposed to be as well, it wasn't for me. I'v eheard we all have gifts and such. I believe it in my mind, but in my heart, not so much. It made me wonder what do I have that I bring to the group? What is my role? Where do I fit in the scheme of things? They are questions that I just keep coming back to.
I absolutely love church lately. People actually make an effort to say hi. Pastor Beaumont actually cares. He came to the picnic. That says a lot even though he didn't stay long. Anthony and Annette. I don't know what I would do without them. They are amazing and I wish they had a picture of everyone, not just the officers. Just sayin. What will be will be.
I'm tired. I'm going to go find ways to occupy myself. Toodles.
No comments:
Post a Comment